Jennifer put me outside for a long time today.
I don’t want her to forget she’s a chicken! she declared, which is the dumbest thing I ever heard.
If she spent ten days outside, would she forget she’s human?
Christopher says she never forgets anything, so I guess the answer is no.
If you’re wondering how I managed outside safe from fair-feather Jenkins, I’ll tell you.
Alongside our coop, Christopher built a wire fence with a swinging gate that when closed, divides the garden in two.
He said it would protect half the garden from our appetites, whatever that means — but I say it was a fortuitous decision considering my current predicament.
Jennifer closed the gate so I was separate and safe then put me on the ground.
O frabjous day!
The sun felt delicious on my air-conditioned feathers! I walked a little funny on account of my missing toe, but sinking my nails in the hot dry dirt —well— that’s a beautiful sensation I barely have words for. Maybe a toaster feels the same when it’s plugged in.
I took a long dirt bath to clear away mites, picked around the ivy, then sat on the porch next to Ollie, the old lady cat my humans adopted a few months back. Ollie remembers I’m me.
Together we lay in the sun and I feel safe.
Let’s count bees, she suggested.
So we did.
I like Ollie.
She’s chill like that.
P.S. My feathers are growing back!
I have a new routine!
Jennifer puts me outside in the morning with my own food and water. Sometimes I make eyes with my sister through the wire fence. I’m not sure what I’d do if she pecked me, so I’m happy to be over here and remember the good ole days.
I can still love her from far away.
Look at my sister. Isn’t she beautiful?
I used to look like that.
I’m used to being alone now, though ‘alone’ may not be the right word. Ollie keeps me company outside. And humans keep me company inside. At night, Jennifer wraps me in a towel and holds me against her chest.
Sometimes we watch movies.
Last night we watched The Revenant.
That bear scene reminded me of you-know-what.
My toe looks funny but it doesn’t hurt anymore. Christopher put a plank of wood over the tub so I can perch if I want to.
Did I tell you both my eyes are open now?
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What did the Mexican farmer say to his hens?
(Am I too hip for the room?)